The Fort Hood Report is a snapshot in time of the largest Army post in the country, from the height of its deployment cycle to the recent drawdown. Below you will find 31 in-depth testimonials from Fort Hood veterans, soldiers and family members who lived through the trauma of that time. We hope you will read their words, along with the report’s recommendations for the U.S. military and government, which emerged from conversations with more than a thousand soldiers, veterans and family members stationed at Fort Hood.
“If they feel that they need you out, they’re gonna kick you out. If they feel they can get a little bit more work into you, it doesn’t matter what your case may be, it doesn’t matter how injured you may be, they’re going to work you until you’re fully broken.”
Read the full testimony of Cody DeSousa *, active duty US Army, Systems Specialist
“(My Commander) said, in front of my counselor, with me in the room, ‘If you had not been drinking that night, you would never have been raped. It is your fault, because you were drinking.’…Nothing was done according to regulation..Honestly, it makes me realize why so many victims do not report.”
Read the full testimony of Rebekah Lampman, US Army veteran, Broadcast Journalist
“After 12 months, he calls me and he’s like, ‘That’s it, I can’t do it anymore.’ He’s on the verge of tears he’s so emotional and stressed. And that’s when I started fighting for him. I went and talked to the battalion sergeant major and it was the worst experience of my life up to this day.”
Read the full testimony of Cynthia Thomas, Former spouse of service-member, Soldier advocate
“Prior to going, our unit was so low in numbers that we actually took soldiers into Afghanistan who were on crutches. We’re walking fifteen, twenty cliffs a day at 10,000 feet elevation through the mountains. The guy just got off crutches and you expect him to be able to do that?”
Read the full testimony of Chas Jacquier, US Army veteran, Military Police, NCO
“I wanted to tell my doctor, ‘These drugs don’t feel good. I don’t want to take these any more, but I don’t know if I can just stop. Or is this a normal feeling? Are the first few days always kind of crazy?’ And I can’t get ahold of him. I don’t have his number. I had to make an appointment for another month out.”
Read the full testimony of Ryan Holleran, US Army veteran, Infantry
“A couple of times, in the middle of the night the pain hit me so bad that I had to be escorted to the emergency room. I’m laying there crying. And they’re like, ‘Well, you’re in the Med Board process, we can’t give you anything.’”
Read the full testimony of Randal Terrell *, active duty US Army, Mechanic, one deployment
“I was more or less told, especially when it came to smoking soldiers, and writing them up, to do everything I could to fuck them up without breaking their profile. Like, some people’s profiles say, ‘Run at own pace and distance.’ The Army takes that as, ‘You run until you fucking die.’”
“The drinking made it worse, and worse. And then, it got so bad that I really couldn’t even do anything but sit there. Some nights I would just cry all night. It was horrible.”
Read the full testimony of Jake Leighton *, active duty US Army, Infantry
“I thought, ‘Oh my God, something is not right.’ He sounded like a whole different person. My friend was there, and I sort of dropped the phone to her and said, ‘Hold on, I need to get some fresh air.’ It was that drastic of a difference.”
Read the full testimony of Nora Leighton *, Spouse of an active duty service-member
“There is a schoolhouse about a block and a half away. And on Sundays during the school year they’ll test their fire alarm. If my wife is asleep when that sound goes off, she is hearing an alarm for incoming rounds. And I can’t count the number of times she’s thrown herself over me trying to protect me from some round that is forever incoming.”
Read the full testimony of Dan Michaels *, active duty US Army, NCO
“My care began when I was in Iraq, after an incident where I pointed a weapon at somebody, and I had to go see a shrink. They had my weapon back in my hands within three days.”
Read the full testimony of Malachi Muncy, Army National Guard veteran, truck driver
“You cannot have PTSD as a pilot. I mean, kiss your career goodbye. You’re done.”
Read the full testimony of Nicolas Addison *, active duty US Army, Apache pilot
“From the time I said, ‘I want to get out,’ until the time I got home to the VA, I didn’t get any treatment. Alls I got was drugs.”
Read the full testimony of Curtis Sirmans, US Army veteran, Cavalry Scout
“One of my very, very close friends was raped by someone in our barracks. And they kept him in the barracks. They didn’t send him to jail. They didn’t do anything like that. They kept him in the barracks. So every time she saw him in the barracks she’d just freeze, and I’d be like, ‘What’s wrong?’ And then I’d look around, and be like, ‘Oh.’ “
Read the full testimony of Kimberly MacArthur *, US Army veteran, Systems Intelligence Analyst
“I get punished all the time, for fighting uphill battles to try and take care of them. So much that I don’t want to be in the Army anymore. I’m just fed up with it. And then all these other soldiers now are stuck with the NCOs who don’t care. They’re here for a paycheck.
…There’s no reward for taking care of soldiers.”
Read the full testimony of Paul Avett *, active duty US Army, NCO, Mechanic
“I just decided to pay out of my own pocket to see a neurologist at Central Texas Neurology. I explained to him my situation—that there wasn’t much being done to help me or to evaluate me. The Army can say that they tried to help me by putting me through physical therapy, but they didn’t help me. You can’t put somebody through physical therapy without identifying the problem.”
Read the full testimony of Mitchell Tate *, active duty US Army, Infantry
“We do have one soldier that was handed to me, who actually went to seek help, and he got the help that he was needing. But now they’re looking at trying to chapter him out because of the help that he had to get, and the things that happened to make him finally turn around and say, ‘Hey, I need help.’.’”
Read the full testimony of Reese Stewart *, active duty US Army, NCO
“Seeing a psychiatrist? That was reasonably easy. You might have had to be on a waiting list, it might take a few weeks unless you were suicidal or homicidal at that moment. But, once you saw the psychiatrist, they gave you the whole cabinet full of pills and they sent you on your way, pretty much.”
Read the full testimony of Mark Simons *, Conscientious Objector
“You do take the survey, you do sit down with what they say is a physician. But you sit in a little cubby and they ask you “Are you depressed? Have you hit your head? Have you done this?” And that’s it.”
Read the full testimony of Anja Perry, active duty US Army, Cargo
“Last week I got my rating from the VA finally, after two and a half years of being out of the military. They’re gonna finally rate me at 100%. I’ve been unemployed the entire time, just because of the disabilities I received in deployment.”
Read the full testimony of Devon Sawyer *, US Army veteran, Tanker
“I have run across numerous forums and other soldier chat-rooms, where I’ve talked to soldiers at other posts that are going through the exact same stuff that I am. That helps a little bit, it makes me feel better knowing I’m not the only one. But it doesn’t change the fact that this is a severe problem, which needs to be addressed and fixed.”
Read the full testimony of Cory Williams *, active duty US Army, Infantry
“My husband talked to everybody that was important. He knew that would help us. We had to extend my leave after my brain surgery. My company only approved 90 days for me, while my doctor had said I needed 120 days to recover, if not more. They were trying to get me back to work, but I couldn’t even walk. I still can’t walk now, barely.”
Read the full testimony of Eve Morgan *, active duty US Army, Special Operations Team
“I just kind of snapped. And that’s when the red flags went up. It took something like that for people to realize that I was legitimately having issues. When before whenever I’d say, ‘Hey, I think I need to go talk to somebody,’ they’d be like, ‘Oh, don’t be stupid. It’ll ruin your career.’”
Read the full testimony of Ian Augusto *, active duty US Army, Tanker
“The Army is already saying they can’t help me. It’s kind of weird, because how in the hell are you going to say to me that you can’t help me, when I gave you all of my fricking youth?”
Read the full testimony of Josue Gomez *, active duty US Army, Infantry
“Whenever I used to have to go to sick call, I’d get that scornful look from NCOs. And the stigma never really stops. They would say, ‘Oh, he’s weak. Screw him, he’s weak. He’s trying to find an excuse, he’s trying to malinger.’ It didn’t stop me from getting help though, because at the end of the day, it’s my health.”
Read the full testimony of Jesse Bowe *, US Army veteran, seven years
“I think that war affects the soldier very much, I have no doubt about that. But I think it equally affects the family. Equally, because I could not even describe to you the pain in the wife’s point of view or the child’s point of view, when the soldier acts out.”
Read the full testimony of Shauna Dione *, spouse of an active duty service member
“I tore my back muscles the first day of Basic Training, and they still haven’t healed right. That was 1998. Their whole gearing was return to duty. If they can’t prove something is actually wrong, they won’t send you to a specialist to find out, they’ll just send you back to duty. They give me some Motrin, tell me to have a nice day.”
Read the full testimony of Allen Dunajs * US Army veteran, Infantry, and his wife Clarissa *