It’s not a presidential election year — which explains my lack of gastrointestinal issues — so when better for the Democratic National Committee (DNC) to quietly, behind closed doors, change their rules to make it even harder for regular people to have any impact on our completely unhinged government?
That’s exactly what they did! But in their defense, they did send out invitations to all DNC voting members with one of Debbie Wasserman Schultz’s inner thigh scabs in each envelope.
The DNC is best known for being the most hated organization in the United States for 26 years running! You’ll never catch up, Child Molesters of Cincinnati Club!
Two weeks ago, as reported in The Intercept, the DNC,
[Q]uietly amended its bylaws, giving the narrower body power to override decisions made by its members at its quadrennial convention. … The amendment removes the authority over DNC decisions from the national convention, which includes thousands of members, and places it instead with the smaller national committee of just under 500.”
Basically, they took the final say of every decision out of the hands of the convention members and put it into the hands of the ruling class of the Democratic Party. It’s kind of like if they no longer let all Americans pick the president, and instead, 12 overly white men with asses in the front went into a cigar-smoke-filled room and after playing a few spirited rounds of waitress sexual harassment, picked a fellow sociopath to lead the largest empire the world has ever known. But in reality, they were already doing that.
No seriously. The DNC, at one point a few short years ago, admitted that they have no obligation to have a fair primary election every four years. According to court filings, DNC lawyer Bruce Spiva said, “We could have voluntarily decided that, ‘Look, we’re gonna go into back rooms like they used to and smoke cigars and pick the candidate that way.’”
Nothing says, “Don’t worry, folks, we always conduct legitimate primary elections,” like saying, “We have no obligation to conduct legitimate primary elections!”
That’s right, in the view of the DNC, a fair and legitimate primary election is like a well-behaved pet chimpanzee that doesn’t rip your face off when you run out of rhubarb pie. You can hope for it, but it’s not a thing.
You might recall that the Democratic National Committee has a history of not being — wait for it — democratic.
During both of Bernie Sanders’ runs for president, they did everything they could to try to stop him and obviously succeeded. They changed rules, lied about results, delayed findings, invented new ways to calculate vote tallies like the bizarre Shadow App in Iowa, which I think was just Angry Birds with Bernie Sanders as one of the birds, and at one point, the DNC forced the nation to look at a wax figure named “Tom Perez” with the personality of a wax figure.
Watch the full report above.
Lee Camp is an American stand-up comedian, writer, actor and activist. Camp is the host of Behind The Headlines’ new series: The Most Censored News With Lee Camp. He is a former comedy writer for the Onion and the Huffington Post and has been a touring stand-up comic for 20 years.